Happiness is it’s own reward and leads to more happiness. Even pretending to be happy can make us happier. Consider the following story.

In 1875 a cleaning woman named Mary St. Clair had saved £60 and hidden it at home. Her ex husband arrived in town and soon after her money went missing. Mary was naturally very angry and wanted her money back but when the local constable arrived, she was arrested for swearing. When he heard her story he then went on to declare her a lunatic and had her locked her up in the local gaol.

I can sort of picture Mary as an angry person, standing up for her rights and giving the constable a piece of her mind. She might have been yelling or screaming or stamping her feet. It is unlikely that she was standing serenely trying to explain the situation calmly.

Our actions don’t usually have such sever consequences, but they certainly lead to the repsonses we get. A naturally happy person who lost a large sum of money would spend time trying to get it back. The anger would be tempered by the knowledge that anger should be channeled into useful action. A happy person is more likely to be believed, trusted and assisted.

An unhappy person believes things will end badly and so helps bring to pass the very thing they don’t want. Our actions affect others reactions and there is nothing we can do about it.

There is a saying that “whether you think you can or think you can’t you are right”. I would add that “whether you think you are happy or think you are sad, you are right”. We are only as happy as we choose to be and if we choose happiness, then we bring more of it into our lives.

Mary spent two weeks in the miserable conditions of that gaol, before they realised she was sane and she was allowed to go home. That was a high price to pay for allowing herself to get so carried away with anger that a constable thought she was insane.

Bad things will still happen to happy people, challenges and sometimes tragedy are part of life, but if we can just belive that we are happy, then we have much more chance of making it come true. I know that from personal experience.

Have a happy day - Nikki

Activating Happiness

There are so many wonderful things to do in life; hobbies, sports, travel, crafts, games, Facebook, social events and so much more. Any one of these can add to our happiness.

But it is also possible for hobbies and sport to interfere with our happiness. Take a minute to consider the questions below and see whether you are creating as much happiness as you could.

   Is there anything in your life which is taking too much time, attention or space?

   Do others complain about the time you are spending on your activity?

   Is anything important being neglected because of other good things that take too much time?

   Are you spending too much time on things that used to make you happy but now make you anxious?

   Are you spending money you don’t have on things you can live without?

If any of these apply to you, then it might be time to slow down, take a break or stop taking part completely. Rest and relaxation are an important part of a happy life and happiness will not last long when there is obsession or addiction.

Neither will happiness last if you have a dull routine. If you find yourself doing the same things week after week, it may be time to add a few different activities to your life. Try something new, experience new things or see new places. It can be as simple as trying a new recipe or reading a new book, or as exotic as planning a round the world cruise. Change can be stimulating and refreshing.

Happiness is not found in never ending business or in mindless inactivity. It is found somewhere in between. Take some time to reconsider how you spend your leisure time and you might just increase your level of the greatest currency there is. Happiness

Cold Mornings and Sad Tales

Yesterday I took a trip into the township where I am staying and noticed a little memorial garden I had never seen before. It has about 40 headstones that have been moved from somewhere else. I was intrigued and began to read some of the head stones.

I was struck by the number of young children that had died in the years the cemetery was operating. The last few headstones were particularly sad. Whole families of children seem to have been decimated.

Joseph Gordon and Mary Atley, lost their first born son on 4th July 1867, the same day he was born. Their daughter died in May 1870 aged two years old.

The Hobsons lost both their sons, two year old Walter and four year old William in 1866.

Henry and Susan Dean had five children born between 1861 and 1866. The oldest of these, Charles died at 5 years old, just four months before their fifth child William was born. Then in 1867 all four of the other children died within a six week period.

I can’t help feeling that we have so much to be grateful for. Grateful for life and health, for good medicine and good doctors and hospitals that save lives.

I did some research and found out that until 1866, the Mudgee hospital was still using candles for light and presumably, open fires for warmth. In 1859, one patient complained that she was not offered water to wash in for two weeks and the hospital matron was accused of being “stupid drunk” on duty. At least twenty per cent of the people in the hospital that year died.

I have just moved to a colder region for four weeks and was feeling rather sorry for myself. There is frost in the mornings and last night a cold stormy rain blew through. Then I read about other families who have lived here and began to be enormously grateful. Grateful for;

Warm beds
Electric Blankets
Slippers and bathrobes
Umbrellas and polar fleece jerseys

When I am tempted to feel sorry for myself it can help to think about how much worse some people have it. An attitude of gratitude makes me happier and attracts more good into my life.

Looking on the bright side is not just an interesting technique or a catch phrase, it is a sensible and healthy thing to do. It will make you healthier and increase your level of happiness. I guarantee it.

Learning to be Happy.

Nothing is as constant as change. We can rely on things to improve, or get worse, to increase or diminish and, if left long enough without attention, gradually fall into chaos. There is no point lamenting the fact that things are not how they were because change is a natural and useful part of life.

Imagine if the sea were static. It would stagnate like the little green pools that have no inlet or outlet. Imagine if the sun never went down or the sky was always blue. How would the ground get moisture? How would we all get rest?

Our lives too need change. Every day brings new challenges and new opportunities. If we try and run from them they will still be there. So how can we cope, especially when change is unpleasant?

Learn to love learning. Take every opportunity to learn and find out something new every day. Learn from every change and every challenge and every hardship. Learn from things that seem to stay the same that you wish would change. Challenge yourself to find the learning in everything that happens and it will help you cope with difficulties and find more appreciation for the good.

Being interested in new things will keep you youthful and energised and make you more interesting to others. Keeping your brain active is also a proven technique to help fight memory loss as we age. Every change, good or bad is an opportunity for learning.

And if things don’t seem to be changing as you would like? Set about creating change. Take a new course, learn a new language or learn to play a musical instrument. Start a new hobby or learn a new skill. Take up chess, or croquet, or tap dancing. The world is a wonderful place and there is so much to learn. Make a list of all the things you would like to do and begin to work on it today.

Someone once said, “A mind stretched by an idea can never go back to its original dimensions”. Spend the rest of your life expanding and stretching your mind. It is a proven path to happiness.